Must have had a dodgy ramen last night because I’ve woken up with a shocking case of the “squirts”. Interestingly (or not) I worked for a company 20 years ago that made Sorbent dunny roll. Made a couple of great friends from the experience, Tails and the unflappable Senator and they may remember the time I was disillusioned at the marketing department’s commitment to new product development. Being that as it was, I designed a product called “Sorbent Squirts”, whose purpose was to capitalize on the growth of yuppies eating more Asian foods with chilli and curry.

Point being that if you have a bad experience the day after indulging in too much of this type of food and you subsequently pay the price downstairs, there is a limit on how much traditional paper can be used without experiencing excruciating pain. Enter the “Sorbent Squirt” with its state of the art ‘mushroom head’ design for ‘dabbing’ not stroking, a paper mache ‘stem’ and a unique ‘tea cup’ holder attached to the stem for easy grip and ability to applicate from a safe distance.

I’ve come up with a number of cutting edge ideas over the years such as when I was working for Smiths I was a big fan of Twisties. I designed a ‘nose bag’ packet that could be used by the Australian male whilst watching the footy on the couch. Keeping both hands free to hold your beer and scratch your nuts. Mia even drew an artist’s impression of me Homer Simpson style on the couch which I submitted also.

Sadly both innovations didn’t get past the first gate but they did piss the marketers off just for a moment so it wasn’t in vain.

Actually been feeling really ordinary today, achy, shaky and cold sweats. It’s seriously freezing here now, surpassing anything the beautiful Ballarat dishes up. That’s cold comfort for everyone at home I know but it appears a change is on the way in Melbourne at least thank God.

We struck gold again this morning with the hotel 400m away from the station. Dropped the bags and headed off down another main drag of a beautiful, spotless satellite city in Japan. This time you could see the unmistakable Himeji castle, Japan’s biggest and most famous castle built 600 years ago.

It certainly takes your breath away as you get closer with its impenetrable walls. The moat that exists is the inner moat. The other 2 are now underground and now have roads going over them

As we entered the castle a man called Hidekazu, a volunteer guide of Himeji Castle approached us and asked if we would like a guide for free! Absolutely! Hide (Hiddy) is a career teacher who now has a company that helps kids pass their entry exams and shows them how to cram. He does the guide thing a couple of times a week for westerners and is so passionate about the castle.

Everything started well as he explained how cleverly the Lord and the samurais designed the castle using the natural landscape, tricky angles and dead ends to destroy a potential enemy. There were also 300 gun turrets and other turrets for arrows, spears and even removable lids up the top so you could throw rocks down on the unsuspecting invaders.

He had a little camera with footage of the movie, The Last Samurai in exactly the same spot where we were standing. Even though the story of the last samurai occurred in Kumamoto, the movie was made at this castle.

Once we were inside things started to deteriorate unfortunately. By the time I climbed the stairs to the 6th story I was pale, sweaty and ready to faint. Hiddy, realizing I was in a bit of bother asked every person heading back down the stairs to clear out as there was a big man coming and he needs the toilet and/or a lie down asap!

He was incredibly understanding and got me to a toilet just in time. He then took us to the castle office and got me a cup of boiling water to settle the gut down for starters. We spent ¾ of an hour discussing all matters of Japo-Australio relations and he patiently answered lots of questions we had about their culture. He then grabbed his bike and walked with us back to the CBD checking I was ok then we said goodbye. He gave us a couple of funny figurines to keep as a momento and I gave him my details so we could take him around Melbourne one day when he visits. The extraordinary thing was that he was 66 years old. We swear he didn’t look a day over 40. He had a kid that age!

Sadly that’s not the way I wanted to visit this world heritage listed building but never mind. We took off through the CBD, had a bite to eat and went looking for wedding rings given we are getting married this year. It’s no biggy just a very small ceremony in a registrars or something similar. My ring size is 27. In Japan, the highest we have got to is 19! Today one jeweler screwed up his face when I asked him for help and reared back at the thought of putting something so delicate on that human sausage!

Started to get worse so picked up what hopefully is the last of the gift shopping for family, friends and team at work. Got back to the hotel and passed out for an hour. Lynda bought some instant noodles for me and the front desk have given me some pain killers.

Tomorrow remains a bit of a mystery as we take the bullet train to Nagoya then we think it’s a regular train through the mountains to Nagano. Should be interesting as always. Hopefully going to watch The Last Samurai tonight on youtube! Hope all’s well. Cheers Willow & Lynda

PS on a lighter note I saw this statue today and it so reminded me of my younger brother Glen. Walking down the street naked playing a saxophone is exactly what he was capable of in his younger days and now he’s been blessed with 2 teenage boys! Now that’s karma!