The False Idols and Joe Mannaugh

There were 2 elderly gentlemen at our club who we absolutely adored. The late Trainer Len “Tiger” Ryan who seemingly was at the club when the first foundations were laid and our property man, the late Joe Mannaugh. Their contribution to the club must never be underestimated. Tiger was like a father to many of the young blokes who came through the club and he was always incredibly organized whether it was at training or a game. Joe was a different cat. At times, depending on how many beers he had, was a maniacal Irish lunatic who swore on every second breath! He was hilarious and I can remember our most annoying teammate Cameron Wright winding Joe up just to see how many expletives he could drop in a sentence! The other star of this song is Nicky Comben, who studiously obeyed every order Joe gave him and was often under your feet retrieving property, therefore, denying any potential theft from players.

Greg and I never wrote a song for Tiger unfortunately but we did do one for Joe for the Cold August Morning show. It was a hit with the players and staff, so much so Mork had us play it again for Joe who turned up to the show late. Enter “Property Man” sung to Billy Joel’s “Piano Man”

Well it’s 8 o’clock in the change rooms

The regular players gather here

There’s an old Irish man standing over there

Making love to his stubby of beer

He says, c’mon you c…s give me your jumpers

I’m pissed, I’ve been drinking since 5

Yes I’m mean but I’m sweet, I’ve got your number on my sheet

I’m the tightest old bastard alive

F… you, F… you, F…. you, F… F… F… you, F… Yoouuuuuuu! (instead of da da da de de da)

Chorus

Give us your jumper I’m the Property Man

Give us your jumper tonight

But I’m taking bribes of alcohol

A dozen stubbies and she’s yours alright

Now Nicky under there is a friend of mine

He gets me my jumpers for free

He hardly makes a sound, like a f…ing blood hound

He hunts down those jumpers for me

He said “Joe this job is really shitting me”

And he let out a great big sigh

Well I’m sure I could be in charge of property